i've never had something die in front of me before. i never thought it would be that painful, or look that painful. the kitten naureen, tz and i had taken in died about half an hour ago. there wasn't even enough time to take him to the vet, not that much could have been done as the vet's own words "you can have him put down now" didn't really leave much to hope for. 4-5 days ago, he was the liveliest kitten i ever saw, now he's dead. i still can't believe it i guess.
i've never felt worse in my entire life. i guess i also blame myself completely for what happened to him. he wouldn't have died so young if only we'd done something sooner...
i've never felt worse in my entire life, a living being just died in front of my eyes. i'm to blame.